An Intimately Knowing God [Day 35]
By Joy Orona
O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away. You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do. You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord. You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand! I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence! If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there. If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me. I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night—but even in darkness I cannot hide from you. To you the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to you. You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me! … Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life. (Psalm 139:1-18,23-24 NLT)
As a proud Gen Xer, my “boring” summers were full of activities such as “Phone Book Roulette,” where we’d flip through the 1000-page white and yellow pages, call strangers (or frenemies), and ask them if their refrigerator was running. Of course, if it was, they “should go catch it!” My mom was also the mom who sat on the front step with her glass of iced tea and watched us (and most of the neighbors in our apartment complex) run up and down the street from lunch until dinner.
Eventually, we would reach the time where all that was left was to sit down next to Mom and people-watch with her. Once I was quiet, she would speak. “So how did you work it out with Dawn after that conflict?” “Did you notice that Omid didn’t have anyone playing with him? Could you have done something differently?” “Do you know how happy it makes me to see you build that ladder on the tree? I’m proud of your creative solution!” As a mom now, I realize she was thinking those things and ready to share them all day, ready to invite me to grow, and ready to reveal her love for me. But I didn’t get to hear her thoughts until I sat down and was ready to be quiet.
How much more are we busy and unable to put down our schedules, our phones, our identities that are gained from what we produce, and forget to wait in the quiet for what the Lord would speak to us? We have become experts at silencing our inner voice with our to-do lists and distractions, and in the process we often silence the Lord’s tender voice as well. I have used my own frantic work schedule and responsibilities as a mom to be even more busy than ever in this time of social distancing and quarantine. And four-plus weeks into it, I am struck that this really is the most incredible opportunity to sit down next to Jesus and people-watch with Him. To become quiet and allow Him to speak. For He has searched me and He knows me, and He wants to surprise me with how intimately He sees me. Friends, our busyness is our attempt to “rise on the wings of the dawn,” to “settle on the far side of the sea,” but He is sitting on the front step with His right hand ready to guide us, ready to hold us fast.
Hear this, dear ones. If we are quiet and listen, He speaks: “I have searched you, and I know you!” “I know what you are about to say before you say it!” “I created your inmost being; I knit you together into exactly who you are.” “I have heard you cry, ‘Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?’ But I tell you, even if you go up to the heavens, I am there; if you make your bed in the depths, I am there.”
Take a step today to be quiet and listen. Choose not to pick up your phone or start the next chore, but to be present to yourself and to Jesus. He is there. See what He has to say to you today. You might be surprised what you hear.
Prayer
Lord Jesus, search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Amen.
